So Friday night I had a great walk/jog. I went almost 3.2 miles in 51 minutes!! I was so proud and excited. When we got home, I took off my tennis shoes and was walking around barefoot when I felt a twinge in the arch of my left foot. It hurt but I just didn't think anything of it. As the night went on it started to really hurt. I had it up and I was reading my Bible and book. When I went to bed I put ointment on it. I woke up around 5:30am to go bathroom and because my foot hurt so bad. When Cornelius woke up around 8am, I told him how bad it was hurting. We decided I should go to Urgent care and get x-rays. It felt awful and I could barely put my weight on it. I was sure I had a stress fracture. Before I left, Cornelius put his hand on my foot and prayed. I was thinking how thoughtful of him to pray but that it was no good, my foot was messed up and that was a fact. On the way to Urgent Care I started praying/talking with God. I was telling Him "Well God, this is just another bump in the road." and then I got all emotional and asked "How could you let my foot be hurt when we just started this journey?" At Urgent Care we took x-rays and they didn't see any breaks but gave me a stiff boot to wear so not to push off on the ball of my foot or to bend it. I got home in time to go to a Mother Daughter Banquet that I was speaking at. Abby and Becca went with me and I wore my boot. Abby sang and so did Becca. It was a special time for me to have this with the girls. I was very good an only ate fruit and veggies. We got home around 4:15 and then Cornelius and I left at 5:15pm to go to dinner with friends from small group. By then my foot seemed a little better. I put my tennis shoes on and I noted again that when we were leaving the restaurant, my foot felt a little stronger yet.
Sunday morning I felt a little achy in my foot and I was amazed how flexible my foot was. I just knew in my heart that God had touched my foot. That I needed to trust and thank Him for doing this. Because the doctor at Urgent Care told me that a sports injury can take time to heal and that I need to heal it by not agitating it. But today as I write this, my foot feels normal and I can bend and flex it like nothing happened. I am believing that my Faith was being tested and that God was again showing me that He is faithful and that I need to trust and believe that He will carry me through this to the end!
This morning I was feeling all discouraged and like I can't do this. I just was thinking about food and coffee. I felt like I wanted greasy fatty food. Julia and I met for lunch today and I was sharing with her my constant battle. She said it's hard to wrap her brain around it. Its hard to imagine you want that food more than the other benefits. And I was thinking how it's all about that instant gratification. You have this instant fix (taste bud fix) and then the guilt because you know you didn't need it. Like a guy who cheats on his wife- he gives in to an in pulse by cheating with another woman, and then feels guilty. But then goes back to that impulse and then eventually it takes him over and he's constantly in sin and cheating on a regular basis. I get a fix too- but its with food. I get that warm feeling and yummy taste in my mouth and then as soon as I'm done eating it I realize that I'm either still hungry or that it didn't satisfy me.
This Sunday, on Mother's Day, will mark 24 days. On Saturday Julia is coming to weigh me and take my measurements. I'm excited....and then I get worried that it's not enough. And then I think "Every little bit is a step in the right direction." I shouldn't be in the business of measure whether it's enough. I should be in the business of saying "one step at a time and keep going because eventually it will be a BIG DEAL" I heard a lady sharing with other women about little things that turn into big things. This is one of those things- where little steps in the right direction keep leading you to the right thing. The discipline of daily Bible reading is feeding my Spirit and strengthening my inner man. Which in turn keeps me strengthened to fight this battle with food. And my discipline to walk and exercise strengthens my physical body and teaches me to crucify the fleshly desires that can easily entangle us.
So my faith was tested big time this weekend and again, My God proved faithful and again, my faith has grown because I continue to see that NOTHING is too difficult for Him. That when you love Him, He loves to love you back and totally surprise you!
"Whom have I in heaven but you? And earth has nothing I desire besides you. My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever." Psalm 73:25-26
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