So this morning I woke up with a headache and it was the kind of headache that I made me want to stay in bed and sleep it off. I felt it coming on last night and so I took tylenol.
Cornelius got home from work around 7:30am and went to bed. He planned to get up around 10am to go to church with me and the girls. I so wished I could just stay in bed....I felt terrible and just didn't think I could do today. The more I thought about the headache, the more I realized what it was. This was the first time I have been without sugar/candy/carbs for 4 days. It was a sugar headache- I've had these before and if I'd eat something sweet, it would go away. I made breakfast for me and Jaelle, Abby and Becca were over to grandma's so the house was quiet. I made my my normal breakfast and Jaelle and I were having so much fun. Family Life Radio was playing some good songs and I was singing along and dancing and Jaelle was smiling and laughing. Then I realized my headache was gone. I still felt a little weak but there was no reason for it. I was eating and I wasn't hungy.
Sunday service was powerful. The message hit straight home and I was brought to tears when I heard Pastor say "My plan wasn't bad. But God's was better" Stephen was preaching about Seeking God, Submitting to Him and then Transformation happening. He talked about how we have plans and agendas and they are not necessarily bad. We sometimes weigh things by either being bad or good. Well, sometimes we can do something that isn't bad, but its not good because it's not God's way or plan for you. I heard Pastor preaching and I thought "This is a good message for someone". But then it was like I got a quick hit to the stomach and it took my breath away and I realize this message was "for me". I was brought to tears. I feel like God has been speaking to me about things in my life and that I need to make sure that I submit to His plan and not dismiss it. Becase when we do, we miss out on the beautiful transformation and blessing that will come out of it.
We left church and I was just so..so....like I was battling. I felt like I needed food and I was grumpy and angry. I told Cornelius that I needed his prayers and encouragement especially today because I was really battling. It was like my body "my flesh" was fighting what I was doing because I am trying to crucify my flesh and follow God and be a good steward of my body. My mind and body felt weak, but my Spirit within me was saying "Stay strong Cherri! I am here with you. Its ok."
We get home and I made mac n cheese, nuggets and peas for the girls. I had a big salad with mexican flavored chicken breast, black bleans, salsa, and a little brown rice. It was good and hit the spot. I felt fine and was full. (and no headache)
Cornelius went to bed so that he could sleep a little before he left for work at 5:30pm. Me, Becca and Jaelle took a nap until 4pm. It felt good. I woke up to eat a fruit slushy- Cornelius made it for me. Strawberries,ice and almond milk blended together and then put in the freezer to get slushy. Very yummy afternoon snack. Becca went with me to meet up with a friend in Crystal to walk a few miles by the lake. It was beautiful and I felt encouraged. I needed to walk and get my mind off of my day and battle.
We drove home to my parents to get Abby and Jaelle and grandpa and headed to Wendy's for some yummy salad with chicken. We came home around 7pm and Jaelle fell asleep at 8pm.
After Jaelle was in bed the girls did my exercises with me. The girls are so good for me. I told my parents tonight that I don't think I would have done those exercises if it wasn't for them cheering me on tonight. I almost feel so undeserving of their support and love. I didn't have to ask them to encourage me or cheer me. They just do and they don't complain and they think its fun to exercise with me. Its so beautiful and I feel so blessed.
Before bed we sat together in the girls' room and we said our prayers and talked. Its so beautiful how I have this time with the girls and they are apart of what God is doing in my life. Its growing me and the girls. Growing us together, and growing us in being healthy and growing....well, maybe transforming us is a better word like what Pastor said in his message- Seek Him, Submit and be Transformed.
What matters is that I keep on keeping on and that I just take one day at a time and fight the battles that come each day. Tomorrow is a new day and I can start fresh and know that I'm going to beat this "demon" in my life- food (overeating).
Good night!
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