Tears in a Bottle

So its been hard to blog when your hubby has been gone for work out of town since April 22nd and with the family computer (laptop).  He finally returned May 4rth at 9:15pm.  The girls gave him a most grand welcome with welcome home posters and so much love and hugging and kisses and jumping on him.  They surely missed their daddy and so much life happened while he was gone.

So I'll begin with the random pictures and then go into the "Tears in a Bottle" afterwards so stay with me!!

So here are the pictures that I took the last week that Cornelius was gone April 29-May 4th. 

BIG HAIR MONDAY (April 29th).  I was hoping that having big hair would help the day start out good.  Well, it didn't. I ended up with a flat tire on my way to work! But thank God it was right as I was getting to work and I was able to park the van at work.  And a most wonderful guy at work, Erik Cummings, changed my tire in his dress clothes and was so gentlemen like.  I was blessed by his kindness.

Jaelle at the Ear Nose and Throat specialist April 29th.  Isn't she a doll?  The specialist took one look in her ears and asked me a few questions and scheduled the ear tube surgery 2 weeks later May 14th at 7:30am.  I am looking forward to her not having so many ear infections- its been nonstop since 11/2012 with ear infections and fluid in her ears. The antibiotic just never would clear it up.  We're praying that this surgery will be just what she needs.

Becca and Jaelle walking in the yard May 1st in the evening.  We have really had such beautiful weather since April 25th.  Its been sunny and just beautiful.  So we decided to go to the pond, catch bugs and frogs and canoe in our little pond.

Jaelle has seen Abby canoe around the pond and she acted like she knew just what to do.

Jaelle practicing her paddling skills before we head out on the pond. 

Saturday, May 4rth our church had a breakfast and craft day for the ladies.  I decided that I needed to go and bring the girls to do something special with them.  I had a sitter arranged for Jaelle but she canceled.  So I had to bring Jaelle. It actually turned out ok with Jaelle- a little more work. (more like a lot more work!) Abby and Becca brought their friend Hannah Palmer with them.  We were painting with acrylic paint and had all kinds of stencils and items to decorate our clay pots. The pots could be flower pots, candle holders or bird feeders.

Becca was so proud of her little bird feeder. She has it on our back porch and the birds have been happily eating from it. :)

The girls felt that Jaelle should make something too. She had a little clay pot base and painted it with her little water paints and then the girls helped her pick out things to glue to it.

This is Gina's bird feeder (the one with pink flowers0 and mine is the smaller one that I'm going to use as a candle holder on my back deck for summer entertaining.  We both did a great job I thought!

And can you see how much Jaelle enjoyed her time?  You would never know that the night before she was up most the night because of being so congested from allergies.  In fact, my dad came over at 1am to help me put medicine drops because her eyes were full of goop....poor kid.  So she slept with me.  She wasn't feeling so good at the craft day but she is such a trooper and always loves being with other people.  You wouldn't have known that Jaelle and mommy spent some time crying the night before in the rocker because Jaelle was just not feeling so good. 

Last night I was faithful and did my first walk/jog of May. 3.1 miles in 46 minutes and 46 seconds. Sunday May 5th, Cornelius measure me with a measuring tape.  We're going to see if I see more tangible results with a measuring tape since my weight loss as been so minimal.  Its so discouraging when you are working so hard and exercising and eating right and still don't see much success on the scale. Thursday May 9th I have a doctor appointment to go over the blood work to check my sugar and thyroid and other lady stuff.

This morning I was feeling especially discouraged and was on the phone with a dear friend from Evansville that is such a praying friend and truly gifted in praying for people.  While she was praying I received this email:

Hi Cherri,

I feel that God has put you on my heart this morning. I'm praying for you and I want you to know that I strongly feel that you are meant to hear this: 

But now, this is what the Lord says-

he who created you, O Jacob,

he who formed you, O Israel:

"Fear not, for I have redeemed you;

I have summoned you by name; and you are mine.

When you pass through the waters, I will be with you;

and when you pass through the rivers,

the water will not sweep over you.

When you walk through the fire,

the flames will not set you ablaze.

For I am the Lord, your God,

the Holy One of Israel, your Savior"

Isaiah 43:1-3

I cried while I read this email.  Tears just streamed down my cheeks- I couldn't stop them and it was healing.

 God knows my heart and what is going on.....and He put my name on someone's heart to pray for me without me having to ask or say one word.  God is with me. And it has been very healing for me to just shed tears and confess that I have really been struggling with depression.  And it's not that I doubt God because I know He is there. I sense His presence and I believe. But there is this real presence or cloud over me and I've tried to pinpoint if this is health related or spiritual/emotional. 

Right now and this morning as I was praying with my friend and read these verses from Isaiah,  I realized that it doesn't matter if this is spiritual or emotional or physical depression.

Because  I am leaning on the promise of this verse this morning while I ride through the storms of my life right now and Jesus is enough...He truly is enough.  And I know that He will reveal what needs to be revealed. That He will help my doctor with test results, that He will heal my heart and emotions.  And that the tears I shed He promises in His Word that He is holding every tear in a bottle because every tear I shed He cares about. "You number and record my wanderings; put my tears into Your bottle—are they not in Your book?" Psalm 56:8 AMP

"Whom have I in heaven but you? And earth has nothing I desire besides you. My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever."

Psalm 73:25-26 NIV